That's a very interesting question Inanna!  It will take a bit of reflection - but I will be back with a reply 

Hi InannaWhimsey,

I don't know that we decided to have children so much as we were okay with them happening.

There was a point when we were no longer okay with them happening and so I made sure that I could play no part in them happening in the future.

That said, they have been a joy and a challenge.  I am the richer for having had the opportunity to raise them.

Grace and peace to you.

John

I like kids. I wanted them. The why is a harder question.

They have individually been both a joy and a challenge. It is certianly a lifetime committment.

I didn't like generic kids, was a lousy babysitter and didn't choose a child-focussed career. I wanted them largely because my husband wanted them and I was okay with the idea (and the production part). It's a bit ironic that I ended up the sole caregiver while he went tiptoeing through the tulips (or whatever he does to resolutely avoid any parental responsibilities for the most part).

But, they've had a huge character-building effect on my life. I came into adulthood with some very rough edges, and they've had a lot to do with polishing them off. I have reserves of patience, goodwill and humour that were pretty well buried in my twenties; I think I'm generally a much better person having been a parent than I'd have been if I hadn't chosen it, but who ever knows for sure? They're adults now; I love them dearly and we're usually quite good friends, as well. I have had a few grandkitties thus far, some grandrats and grandmice and currently a grandGuineapig.

I have one granddog and I love her to bits. 

Having kids was something we both wanted to do, each for our own reasons.  We realised that we didn't want to wait for endless years so set about getting pregnant as soon as our financial situation was settled (regular income from employment that was likely to continue). We did still have student loans to pay off and had to rent a place to live for several years.  

The choice meant that we were always a bit short of money - but not to level of impoverished.  We were lucky enough to be able to provide all the needs and some of the extras. 

Raising them was challenging, envigorating, heartbreaking, joyous and EXPENSIVE even though we didn't plan to provide them with 'everything they wanted', - like cars, admission to special events, movies, name brand clothing, equipment for every sport available, free university etc..

We assume we did adequately well as they are very different in personality, interests, activities, life style, they vary in opinion about money, poltics, and child rearing!  They still talk to us and each other, which is a big plus that some families don't get. .

Poor kids fisnished up having a 'good enough' childhood, but not the 'perfect' one they may have desired (I don't think such a thing exists).

As recently as 60 or so years ago, before 'the pill' was perfected, people didn't so much ponder parenthood as accept it.  If you got married you would likely have children.  You might try to plan the number, and control the spacing, but it was almost a matter of hit or miss - and some people who would have been happy with two children were blessed with eight or nine.   So, if you got married, it was pretty much presumed that you would be starting a family.

I was 23 when I got marred.  That was old in my area and culture.  Many of my school friends had married in their late teens and already had one or two children.  And I got married with the intention of having a family.   I was delighted when my son was conceived and born just before our first anniversary - my mark in the world.  I hoped for another baby in two or three years - but was blessed with al little girl a few weeks after my son's first birthday.   Unplanned but not unwanted.   She is the joy of my life and the mother of my grandchildren.

(Another unplanned pregnacy, when the kids were pre-teens, resulted in a miscarriage, or I would have had a third child.)

We expected, and accepted, children.  I sometimes wonder what it would have been like to be able to choose.  Most likely we would have had our first child - but would our situaton (my health, economics, housing, marriage) ever have been 'right' to plan another child?    Life would certainly have been easier without childrren or with only one - but would it have been better?