At first when teenage girls were talking like this I was shocked and upset. I thought they were encouraging people to become gay when they were not. But I see it more and more, heterosexual girls and guys both admitting when they think another girl or guy is attractive. 

I'll admit I like Milla Jovovich, cause she looks like Dave Gilmour. Maybe she's my girl crush. 

Just something to think about. And I know my needle isn't fully to the testosterone pumped, short haired, muscle man side. 

There's the Kinsey scale. Most people don't fall at one extreme end or the other. It's not a new idea. That's why I think it's ludicrous for people not to support LGBT rights, one of the reasons- it's hypocritical because most people fall somewhere in the middle of the scale. Most, closer to one end or the other, some right in the middle. And different people responded differently at different ages and points in their lives. Totally common for college kids to 'experiment'. No big whoop, IMO.

http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kinsey_scale

You know, a part of me kind of wishes that we could just be "sexual" and not worry about defining ourselves in terms of who we are attracted to or getting it on with. Treat each person as an individual in terms of how they express and enjoy their sexuality.

For instance, (hypothetically speaking) I could be a guy who normally prefers women but maybe gets attracted to the odd man who catches my eye without having to figure out if that makes me a bicurious heterosexual or a true bisexual. It's just me being me without reference to labels that are really owned and defined socially rather than by myself.

Would cause a certain degree of social upset and chaos, I suppose, especially for those used to or comfortable with the existing labels but would also remove one basis for dividing people into groups and would focus things more on the individual than on the label. After all, it's hard to stereotype someone if you don't have a neat label to pin on them.

Idealistic, I know, but one can always wish.

Mendalla

Yeah. 

This topic reminds me of when I first started High School....

As well as just starting to be attracted to boys, I had these crushes on a couple of my female teachers.

I was so worried about this turn of events that I told my Mum I was worried I was turning into a lesbian.  (In those far-off days, in society's terms, a case of shock, horror.) She just smiled and said that when she was my age she had a crush on her female French teacher, and not to worry about it.....

A psychological explanation I've read suggested that it was a stage of development we go through -and it's often about seeing in the other a value that is still latent in us.

Looking back, I can see some truth in this. The teachers were all intelligent assertive women and differered from the traditional "stay at home" Mums that were the norm in those days. (I  was beginning to question the traditional female role as being all that attractive.)

That said, I don't know if we ever outgrow this need......

I still come across women who hold some kind of "magic" for me. I find them exciting to be with, and they are very much like my childhood teacher crushes.

I don't wish to have sex with them - anymore than I did my teachers - but the intensity of my feelings for them is something I've never completely understood. (Other than that I admire them a lot).

It's strange , isn't it?

To share yourself with another, at your most intimate level, is sexual. Yet, whether we're hetero or homo, we have one sex where that is desirable, sexually.

This leaves a big question mark on what do we "do" with same -sex "magical" folks if we're hetero and, conversely, opposite sex  "magical" folks if we're homo?

Maybe we should invent a secret handshake like the Masons, lol!

There was a lot of bi-curiosity going on during my early college days and into my mid twenties. Early- mid 20's. Art school parties, university/ college parties, raves. Girls more so than guys. For guys it was much more of a closeted thing here, ( amonst the otherwise straight crowd, generally). I don't know why but I got the sense it was something men would have felt more shame over than women, in those days (mid 90s)- to kiss in public, for example, at parties, clubs. No one seemed to mind so much, young women. They weren't so open to two men kissing. I am speaking about bi-curiosity in mostly straight, not gay, people. I don't know why, and I am not sure if that has changed. It was a long time ago. It probably has.

That was in the big city. Back in my hometown smaller city, not as open. But I had friends I visited in the big city, where it seemed not unusual there, but something hardly anyone would bring up at home.

I know quite a few people who use the term girl crush as one of admiration and it isn't based in sexuality or romantic attraction.

Hmm, that's interesting Chemgal. Maybe I should ask this girl I know more about it... 

Thanks Pilgrim (sorry I'm late reoplying). I've never had a crush on a teacher, male or female myself, but have had this different sort of admiration of Xena. Certainly an assertive, intelligent, non traditional woman! Might be fun to make out with a hot man alongside her...  A value that is latent in us: that's a good explanation. I did look up to Xena and wanted to be more like her, find my own inner Xena. It really helped on the birthing bed! "Xena could do it! Xena could do it!" I thought to myself.

I don't remember much sexual experimentation in my rave days, maybe I just thought those people were gay... Certainly kissing a few guys for me, but I don't remember girls kissing girls... or maybe it was so normal to me at the time I didn't take note... People were doing a lot of Ecstacy all around, and kissing was one fun thing to do while high on that. 

I think there's something to empathizing when we see a sexy woman too. We can imagine BEING her, and therefore can feel sexy ourselves... I heard that in a documentary about advertizing once. ANd it's also true to an extent in men, but more so in women. 

Thanks Chemgal, those are very good definitions. I feel much clearer on the subject. : )

Xena is still my girl crush. 

Big ugly scary oaf:  "Looking for the man of your dreams darlin'?"

Xena:  "Yup."  (hard punch to the stomach, oaf doubles over)  "And yer not him."

She is so boss.