I'm really sorry about what you're going through, I know it's a hard thing to deal with.I'm bisexual; my dad and stepmom are very supportive, but my mom doesn't even know yet because I haven't got up the nerve to tell her.

I grew up the same way; my mom always taught me that homosexuality is a sin, it's gross. "God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve", she'd say.

But what our parents are missing is that homosexuality is a part of us. Some could argue that we're born with it, some say it's a choice influenced by life's experiences. I think it's a mixture of both. Either way it doesn't change the person your parents have known you as your whole life.

First of all, I congratulate you grandly for telling your parents. That's a feat in itself. Secondly, I wish you the best of luck in whatever you decide.

Just don't change for anyone else; you know who you are, if you're happy with it then that's who you need to continue to be. Things will be hard for a while with your parents, and you may never be reconciled...but you probably will. Most people in our situation do end up coming to some sort of understanding with their parents. It will just take time.

Whatever you do, talk to your parents. That's the only way to explain to each other how you feel, and to work through things. I know I'm being a hypocrite when I say that but, trust me, it's important to talk.

Also, make sure you listen. Try to be in their shoes, as hard as that may be. Keep in mind that your parents are older now, and a lot has changed since they were kids. They grew up in a society where homosexuality was wrong, so now they're passing that on to you.

Good luck with getting your own place, or staying at your friend's place. You're pretty young to have to go through that, but what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

Wow, sorry about the long post!! I just want to help in whatever way I can...not that I have much to offer.

If you need to talk, drop me a line.

Oh FG.... hugs to you.

I can't imagine how unbeleivably hurt you must be right now. I really have no idea what advice to give you. Just know that all of us here at the Cafe love you and will never evict you! I hope your parents realize their mistake and eventually accept you just the way God made you but if not always remember to be true to yourself no matter what.

I'll be praying for you.

thanks, guys.

Hey FG,

I found this blog of yours this morning before anyone had commented on it.  I wanted to post something, but I just couldn't think of a single thing to say in this situation.  I'm floored -- I know this happens to more gay youth than we realise, but now it's happened to someone I know (even if I only know you through WC).

First of all, listen to the above comments and I'm sure there will be other helpful and caring comments following this one.  Though your parents may have trouble accepting you at the moment (which hopefully will change in the future), we accept you here, we want you here.

The only piece of advice I can really give is to do whatever you can to make sure you have a safe and stable roof over your head each night.  Hopefully that means you can work out a truce with your parents that allows you to stay home.  If not, hopefully it means that possible arrangement with your friend works out.  If not, hopefully you can find a home with a trusted family member.  If all else fails, perhaps the best would be to go to the school.

Here's why I say this.  I have met with and talked with an employee at RAY many times.  RAY stands for Resource Assistance for Youth and it's based in downtown Winnipeg, they tend to the homeless teen population in Winnipeg, and boy there's a lot of them.  Many of them are from Winnipeg and many are from across the country -- they hitchhike from city to city looking for work and many get stuck in Winnipeg.  The sad fact is that a number of gay youth are kicked out of their homes and they try to eke out a living on the street.  Unfortunately, except for a few lucky individuals, once a youth is on the street, that youth is pretty much always on the street.  Many die on the street.

Don't ever let this happen to you.

I don't know your situation all that well, perhaps there's no risk of you being kicked out onto the street, but I worry about that a lot.

If the choice comes down to the boarding school or the street, please take the boarding school.  But hopefully, it won't come to that.

Work on rebuilding your relationship with your parents.  Try to work out a truce if understanding is not possible at this juncture.  How old are you?  If you're nearing university age, perhaps you can work out a deal to let you stay home for another year or two and then move out when you go to university?

One possible suggestion for you -- perhaps you should repost this in the social board or the relationships board?  Those are a little bit more high visibility than the blogs and you may find helpful advice from the people that frequent these areas?

Wishing, hoping, and praying for better days ahead for you,

YW

 FG 

it makes me really sad to read this. i wish parents could understand homosexuality as not a sin, and that you are who you are.i have not experienced this before but i will pray for you and your parents. 

good luck- keep us informed 

10xreality

FG, post this in the discussion forums. There will be more traffic. And what YW said.

FG, my heart just fell to the floor. Ewww! It's so fustrating, why are people so bloody stubborn, this is just in their head.  Without really knowing you or your parents, I want to say that I have to believe it will work out for you, it just has to.  From what I know of you on the WC you're a fun loving, intellegent individual and I know your parents see that in you.  If you have no choice but to move out please, please mind YW's words don't turn to the streets.  Find relatives or friends that can take you on and get a part-time job of sorts that you can do and still finish school, very important.

Gosh!, I hope the light turns on before you move out, 'cause surely, once your gone they'll probably regret this decision.  I don't know about boarding school, how would that stop you from being gay?

CH had a point post this to the discussion forums, surely someone will have concrete advise for you. 

Perhaps, your minister could talk to them, do you have open minded relatives that could chat with them.  Who do they look up to, perhaps they could help? I don't know, I'm fishing.

Best of Luck, I'll be praying for the best

FG

That is horrible. I must tell you though that I am moved to hear that you are still faithful in God. That is amazing. I can't imagine what I would do if MY parents kicked me out for being gay.

I feel for you bro. Im praying for you.

Maybe your parents will stop being so old fashioned about this and see how great you are. Fingers crossed.

Hey FG, like wonderbread said, I was impressed too by your faith in God in times of adversity like this. Firstly, shout out "Milk" is awesome, I almost cried when he died at the end. Second, I'm deeply sorry for what happened. I can understand how devasted you must've been when rejected by your own dearest ones. However, you have to stay strong, God will give you ample strength. Your story reminds me of a news I've heard today. Three young girls were killed in Kingston, Ontario, in the hands of their own parents becuase they refused to follow the traditional religious values. I think it's Muslim, I cant recall exactly, but you get the idea. They even called this an "honour killing", how ironic. The act stirred a lot fuss and was considered ridiculous by many. But the fact that many queer teenagers are kicked out their house for religious reason like yours, is just another form of this madness. I hope your parents, and society in general, can open their eyes and start seeing the parallels and realize the negative impacts their actions can cause. I resonates your pain,and think you should try to talk to your parents about this in logical, as well as emotional terms. I'll pray for you too, and hope things will get better for you! Stay strong and know that there's a lot of us that cares about you!

Skyy

FG,

I've been away from this site for a while, but I just checked in and read your blog.

I'm so sorry that you have to deal with this. From what I've read you're an awesome and caring guy. I feel really angry after hearing this, so I can only imagine how you're feeling. I don't have anything to offer other than a supportive ear, and my prayers for you and your family.

Take care friend,

Mike