GeoFee
Good Friday Reflections
Posted on: 04/18/2014 16:44
I asked my partner in life, Barbara, if she would reflect on a text during the service this evening. Here what she will present.
"Good Friday is a church story that we all know well, perhaps too well. It has become too familiar. It holds little mystery. Like Goldilocks and the Three Bears, I can tell it by heart but spend little time thinking about its true meaning.
In order to experience Good Friday as more than just a nice story, to see it as a story that is immediately relevant to my world, I meditated on the following passage:
Matthew 9:36 reads, “But when He saw the multitudes, He was moved with compassion for them because they were faint and were scattered abroad, as sheep having no shepherd.”
I offer my mediation to you this Good Friday. Not all of it will be applicable to you or your life. But hopefully, it will help you to think about the meaning of these words.
I feel faint.
It is true that I am often feeling overwhelmed these days. I find myself not turning on the TV during news hours. I cancelled our subscription to the Free Press. The news is too depressing. I read about how our environment is threatened. The doomsayers are predicting terrible changes to our climate and our food sources. I hear about unemployment, addiction, and leaders that have committed atrocities to gain personal power. I learn of senseless crimes, of mass murders, of torture, and cruelty that defies my imagination. I confess that I too often use mindless distractions in my life so not to face the horrors of this world.
There is so much violence in the news. I feel powerless to do anything about it. I am worried that I am becoming desensitized to the violence that surrounds us, particularly when it happens to people outside of my own circle and community. I can read about wars and conflicts in other countries that have sacrificed innocent people for political gains and barely register an emotion. I can feel nothing when I watch television footage of a landslide in India that killed thousands. I can feel empty of compassion as I gaze upon the image of a starving child at home on our television while I snack on potato chips or ice cream.
It is true that I give money when I can to help those less fortunate than myself. I have worked with many mentally ill, addicted, and marginalized people in my work and as a volunteer. But I confess that I distance myself from their problems and their reality when I am not with them. I use a professional pose of respectful empathy in their presence but I am relieved that there are parts of my life that do not include them. I see our home as a sanctuary from all that pain and suffering.
I often feel inadequate in the face of others’ pain. In my small network of close friends, I watch people struggle with cancer. depression, being wrongfully maligned by others, losing a job, grieving for a loved one, divorce, being bullied or being ostracized, being shunned by others because of sexual orientation or race, and loneliness. I know that I have little to offer them. I confess that there have been times when the enormity of others’ suffering causes me to distance from them.
I have my own suffering that makes me overwhelmed at times. I have had people interpret my actions in the most negative ways, even though they were intended for good. People have told falsehoods about me and what is worse, people I care about have believed these lies. I have been excluded from certain groups or activities because I don’t fit in, I am different from others. I have been deeply hurt by the gossip that surrounds me. I often feel that some people are preferred to myself – that I am not quite good enough. I confess to avoiding people and groups that I think might reject me or treat me badly. I don’t let them know me in a real way.
I am scattered abroad, as a sheep having no shepherd
I used to have heroes that I looked up to. Now I hear of all types of people in positions of authority who have abused the trust of others, be it ministers, police officers, teachers, or counsellors. Sport and movie stars are often revealed as people with addictions or causing harm to others. Political leaders are often exposed as liars and cheats.
I am increasingly cynical about the institutions I once loved and supported without question. Money has become the tail that wags the dog in universities, hospitals, social service agencies, and I dare say, churches. I am tired of fundraising efforts and think tanks to develop creative ways of creating income.
No institution has disappointed me as much as the church. The bureaucracy and rules of the larger United Church at times serve to stifle our creativity and life in congregations. Some ministers are preoccupied with housing and book allowances and benefits while many in the congregation are losing their jobs and some are living in poverty. Churches that say they are open to everyone are often closed to people who are different from the mainstream. I see few congregations that are truly welcoming to people that the rest of the world would define as “weird” or “freaks.”
The predictions about how many United Church congregations will close in the next ten years comes as no surprise when you see the dwindling numbers in the pews. Even our own children see little place for the church in their lives.
I confess to becoming increasingly pessimistic about the future of institutions. I avoid being involved in ways that would give me a voice in the future directions of the institution. I say, “What difference will it make?”, rather than “How can I make a difference?” I contribute to others’ anxiety by speaking of my negativity at length. I do not offer solutions, only critique.
Dear Lord, as a child, I spoke to you as my best friend. You were ever present in my life as a real and living entity. Lately, I find myself sometimes going through the motions of church, saying the words and doing the actions. At those times, I am not confident that you are there. Sometimes it feels that you have forsaken me.
So on this Good Friday of 2014, I ask you Lord to be my shepherd. Help me to look squarely in the mirror and to face how my decisions have caused me to stray from your path. Give me the courage to experience Good Friday as you did. Help me to experience the betrayal, loneliness and suffering that you lived through.
Amen"
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Pinga
Posted on: 04/18/2014 19:46
Those are powerful words and emotions, GeoFee.
I can relate to some of the writing there.
I went to a Good Friday special concert today at our church, taking my father as I knew he would love it
The service was a journey through the Holy Week, complete with video / imagery of Jesus through the sessions.
The choir was quite talented with approx 50 people, various soloists, duo's, plus violins, clarinette, flute, drums guitars.
The words though, were Blood and the Lamb, about sin and salvation.
The choir itself came from the New Apostolic church which has a theology which is about as far from a church that was known for being progressive and is Affirming.
I sat and felt myself more & more removed.
At the end, our church's choir director was glowing wiht praise for them, clearly envious of their choir.....
yet, all, i could do was think about how appalling their theology was and how frustrating the whole thing was.
what is wrong wiht me? I feel frustrated or "faint" in the multitudes who bow down before big choirs with good sound.
Beloved
Posted on: 04/18/2014 21:26
Dear Lord, as a child, I spoke to you as my best friend. You were ever present in my life as a real and living entity. Lately, I find myself sometimes going through the motions of church, saying the words and doing the actions. At those times, I am not confident that you are there. Sometimes it feels that you have forsaken me.
So on this Good Friday of 2014, I ask you Lord to be my shepherd. Help me to look squarely in the mirror and to face how my decisions have caused me to stray from your path. Give me the courage to experience Good Friday as you did. Help me to experience the betrayal, loneliness and suffering that you lived through.
Amen"
As I reflect tonight on my Good Friday - the service I attended this morning, my personal faith and understanding and things I am going through at this time in my life, and my relationship with my church - I find myself in the space of questioning. What is my understanding of the God of the Good Friday part of the Easter story? As the message this morning focused on the words in the readings and reflections such as sacrifice, sin, thorns, crown, nails, cross, death, suffering, I found myself trying to understand the Good Friday part of God's plan. Like the author posted above, the story is so familiar. Yet I struggle to find it's meaning for me. I think of the words that were read as spoken by Jesus to Pilate . . . "You would have no power over me if it were not given to you from above." Tonight I work through how I understand this age old story as told in the bible. I find I have to do this before Sunday in order for me to rejoice in the Easter Sunday part of the story.
stardust
Posted on: 04/20/2014 14:32
GeoFee
I'm a bit perplexed by your long confession above. I was waiting to read who had written it thinking it was surely a quote. Perhaps your wife has written it as a sort of wake up call directed towards whomever?
Whatever.... Geofee, your post above in no ways describes the GeoFee I have come to know on the WC, be it Good Friday or any other day. You're not half or quarter that bad or gloomy. On the other hand perhaps you would have made a very good Catholic saint many many years ago? You may be a reincarnation of one...........
.
Gosh I'm not very good or holy but I can't confess to being guilty of much that you have written.....and neither can you....!!!! Is this something commonly done in the UC on Good Friday, some kind of expected protocol similiar to the Jewish Yom Kippur where the Jews spend all day at the synagogue confessing their sins?
If your post represents me I had better run and hide under the bed................................>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
....IMHO...in my HUMBLE opinion...!!!
stardust
Posted on: 04/20/2014 15:11
GeoFee
I wonder if you have read any of this saint's revelations? She is the one that Mel Gibson based his movie the Passion of the Christ of in part ? I was in a group discussion on beliefnet in 2006 about the movie which is what peaked my interest to read about this saint's life. Its a long read, I read some chapters of it, especially her new revelations about Jesus crucifixition etc. in the NT if I recall correctly from 2006.
If I were Catholic I would nominate you as the Patron Saint of the WonderCafe
.
InannaWhimsey
Posted on: 04/20/2014 16:09
GeoFee,
i've seen it happen afore -- someone writes a rulebook for others to use and play with and then, over time, comes a group who starts elevating the rulebook as 'OfficialTMRSTLNE' and there are fights between this group and everyone else...
it happens in tabletop rpgs and in religious rpgs...heck, probably everywhere else as well?
good thing the Hebrew & Christian bibble are open source now...so people can fiddle if they want to...and yes, those Orthodox who still want to hold up the rulebook as Official can do so as well
spice is the variety of life
stardust
Posted on: 04/20/2014 18:35
InannaWhimsey
At my age if I admit to suffering from too many of the maladies mentioned in the OP by GeoFee I'll be classified mentally as suffering from dementia, alzheimers, depression, or some such devastating illness........
. I do suffer from "burn out" on occasion.
Jim Kenney
Posted on: 04/20/2014 23:20
Stardust, I thought these words were by Geofee's wife about herself, not Geofee.
Pinga, I fully get were you are coming from. Choosing music that sounds good with words that are also helpful can be quite challenging, especially for Holy Week and Easter. I am discovering as I pay attention to the words in some of my favourite hymns that the words are no longer acceptable to me. I hope your father enjoyed the music part.
kaythecurler
Posted on: 04/21/2014 10:45
Pinga - your description of the service you attended sounded more like entertainment than church as I think of it on Good Friday. If I was in the decision making seat I think I might be inclined to invite a choir to present a concert at a time that wasn't a regular service time.
stardust
Posted on: 04/21/2014 11:05
Jim Kenney
I don't suppose those words represent GeoFee or his wife ( perhaps partly sometimes for all of us ) so I presume it was food for thought, to make us think about our lives and what we are doing.
GeoFee
Posted on: 04/21/2014 12:02
Hi folk,
Looking towards Good Friday, I asked Barbara if she would be willing to share her personal reflections in light of the text:
“But when He saw the multitudes, He was moved with compassion for them because they were faint and were scattered abroad, as sheep having no shepherd.”
The thoughts above indicate her personal confession of inner experience most often submerged in the press of daily responsibility.
Looking deep, I think she reached a place where many in the modern world find themselves. Giving voice to the somber place, she allowed hearers in the room to get in touch with their own deep longing for things to be other than they are.
Walter Brueggemann suggests that the modern imagination is relentlessly pressured to put on the appearance of happiness. It is almost an act of treason to indicate discontent in a context that is so rich in so much.
How could anyone be unsatisfied when we live in the best of all possible lands in the best of all possible times?
At Steinbach United, where I am in service just now, we determined to look the darkness of our time squarely in the face.
We named the deep dread that works as anxiety in the vast majority of persons in our consumer culture. I employed the passion narrative as a clear presentation of the abuse of power by religious and political structures serving the few at the expense of the many.
The crucifixion of Jesus is a travesty of human being, where a benevolent person is cruelly punished for contradicting in word and in deed the malevolent theological and political ethos of the day.
It is no different today. Wherever we turn, human being is abused and oppressed for the sake of values that have brought us to the brink of catastrophe.
It is so easy to value and promote the Jesus who lets us off the hook. Not so with the Jesus who calls us to responsibility. With Peter, we are afraid to acknowledge our companionship with one who remains the patient and persistent opponent of things as they are and advocate of things as they may be.
It takes courage to name the dark for what it is. By that courageous naming life is liberated from its deep bondage to the fear of death. Easter makes plain the irrepressible urge to light which is the divine word written within us each and all.
George
Pinga
Posted on: 04/21/2014 13:23
Choosing music that sounds good with words that are also helpful can be quite challenging, especially for Holy Week and Easter.
I empathisize with the minister's challenge. It is good when a minister is engaged in the music selection.
There are some good "story" type hymns that can be used, some wonderful imagery as well.
Easter was the same challenge, with the old tried & true hymns being what was sung, as compared to a mix. There are options which do not require us to sing only hymns that were popular before my grandmother was born.
I get wanting to sing them, but sadly, I just can't belt them out or add gusto. I saw the young lad who brought his grandmother to the Good Friday service leave the pews and the look on his face was "thank God I survived another one, nwo to get home". Does it really have to be that way?
Oh, he did. I had him sitting at the front, and his hands were just a going to the music. He loves it. He had/has a good voice, loves to sing, just never joined a choir. It is too bad as he would truly have loved it.
For that, it was worth it. Same with Easter.
Arminius
Posted on: 04/22/2014 09:48
To me, the best Good Friday music is that part of Richard Wagner's Parsifal when Parsifal, the hero of the opera, is immersed in contemplating the three drops of blood in the snow, on the morning of Good Friday, on his way to see the hermit Trevrizent.
To me, this music expresses all the pain in the world, but also transcends all pain, and leads into the spiritual realm.
mrs.anteater
Posted on: 04/23/2014 06:31
Geofee,
Thanks to Barbara for those honest words. While we don t have those feelings all the time, I do believe if one is honest enough, one can find them. At least, I do.
For me, this is the starting point for an outreach committee to work on. Instead of just Being the "good charity givers" I believe we are called as a community to face those feelings and attitudes and help each other out. Where one reaches his limits, the other ones can skip in. That s why it takes community to do this.