MistsOfSpring
Seriously???
Posted on: 02/08/2012 23:46
Soooo...my week so far:
Monday: I call to talk to Jim and I find out that he's been admitted to the hospital over night because he's so dehydrated.
Tuesday: I call again and find out he's out of the hospital, but they have reduced his Interferon and put him on an antidepressant because there are concerns that he's becoming more depressed while on them, which might also be leading to him not eating and drinking enough. He says he's a little more depressed than usual (he's usually depressed) but that he's not eating/drinking because the Interferon makes him nauseous and he's sleeping and doing nothing all the time because he's completely exhausted from it, as well a from the anti-nausea medications and now the anti-depressant, too.
Wednesday: My in-laws are really worried about Jim and how he's doing. They say he's in really rough shape. (Mind you, they don't see him on a daily basis...they probably don't realize that he's been depressed for quite a while, so to them it appears to be a huge drop.) THEN I find out that Jim's dad also has cancer! He has prostate cancer and was apparently diagnosed at least last November, but they didn't tell us because Jim was about to have surgery. They didn't plan to tell us at all, at least not yet, but Jim and his dad had appointments at the same time in the same clinic, so they had to let him know. I wish it had been possible to wait until his Interferon treatments were over since he's staying with them, and if I know Jim he's going to feel even more like a burden now that he knows about his dad, even though it appears that his dad's cancer is not as advanced.
*sigh* This is so frustrating and scary. I keep thinking "What next?" but I'm afraid to ask.
Search
Recently Active...
Comments
Tabitha
Posted on: 02/09/2012 00:01
Ah Mists hugs to you!
Prostrate cancer has a very good cure rate!
Glad Jim is receiving medical care.
Ask yourelf if it would help, or not, if you were also staying there?
Interesting family dynamics of his parents not wanting to burden the 2 of you.
Alos of his parents not realizing how much depression affects Jim most days.
That said Wow what a week!
Glad Rachel is hiolidaying with her other grandparents=so she's not in the mix!
May Thurs. and Friday be better-even boring for you and may your weekend and time with Jim include some time for just the 2 of you!
somegalfromcan
Posted on: 02/09/2012 03:27
Wow Mists - that is a lot to take in.
I can think of one benefit (which is not really the word I am looking for, but the best one I could think of) to Jim and his Dad each having cancer is that they will each have someone who truly understands what the other is going through when it seems that the rest of the world does not.
My thoughts and prayers are with all of you.
Kimmio
Posted on: 02/09/2012 05:53
I'm so sorry to hear of yet more health problems in your family Mists...you have so much going on already. I'm glad you have some support and help, and always us here when you need to talk about it. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Take good care of yourself.
Tabitha
Posted on: 02/09/2012 15:08
Trusting Thursday was more positive....
seeler
Posted on: 02/10/2012 10:25
Mists, just to let you know, I'm here, I'm listening, I care.
Tabitha
Posted on: 02/10/2012 11:53
bumpf for other w/c to see!
myst
Posted on: 02/10/2012 13:24
MistsOfSpring - I cannot imagine what you are all experiencing. I really have no words - but I do offer my care and support and I will continue to hold you in my thoughts throughout this very challenging, upsetting, scary time.
Pilgrims Progress
Posted on: 02/10/2012 15:35
Mysts,
M'dear, I suspect there isn't anyone at Wondercafe who wouldn't feel overwhelmed and anxious in your situation.
In that sense, you are not alone.
Perhaps just do what you can, accept help when offered, and just live one day at a time - for that is enough to contend with right now.
Beloved
Posted on: 02/10/2012 15:38
Wow, MistsOfSpring . . . what an awful lot going on in your life! Hoping you find help and support from those nearest to you at this most difficult for all of you.
lastpointe
Posted on: 02/10/2012 15:49
Tough week for Jim.
Suggest his mom buy popcycles. They are easy to eat even when you feel nauseated because of being cold. Even just sucking on ice cubes is a good thing.
Perhaps jim and his dad will benefit from going through this together.
Speak to your mother in law about what help you can give and ensure she is tapping into her resources at church and friends and the cancer society
lastpointe
Posted on: 02/10/2012 15:49
Tough week for Jim.
Suggest his mom buy popcycles. They are easy to eat even when you feel nauseated because of being cold. Even just sucking on ice cubes is a good thing.
Perhaps jim and his dad will benefit from going through this together.
Speak to your mother in law about what help you can give and ensure she is tapping into her resources at church and friends and the cancer society
revjohn
Posted on: 02/12/2012 09:15
Hi MistsOfSpring,
*sigh* This is so frustrating and scary. I keep thinking "What next?" but I'm afraid to ask.
It never rains but it pours eh?
I'm sorry to hear that Jim is having a rough go of it. All things considered, I have never heard cancer treatment described as rocking good times. Chemotherapy is a war of attrition and war is, as the saying goes, hell.
So yes, there is concern. And yes, things are not going as well as hoped. As far as cancer treatment goes, it seems pretty much par.
Your in-laws worries are your in-laws worries. They share them with you so that they don't have to carry them all alone. They could probably be a little more sensitive about that than they appear to be. Still, Jim is their son and parents watching their children suffer are insensitive to most needs outside of their own. I'd say that is pretty much par as well.
That coupled with Jim's dad's own diagnosis means they are under a fairly heavy load themselves.
I can imagine that you'd like to help them. I can also imagine that you don't have much left of yourself that is burden free to give. So, I think that it is best that you focus on what your needs are at present.
Jim has doctors and nurses attending to his needs. They are telling you what they are finding and they are reporting how they are addressing each problem as it arises. Ignorance would be bliss. Ignorance is not an ethical option for the doctors and the nurses.
Jim's dad also has doctors and other medical professionals attending to his needs.
The plate is full and not much on it looks very appetizing. So, focus on that which you can manage and ignore the rest.
Grace and peace to you.
John