My daughter went through this at a very young age. It's terrifying to watch and to feel so helpless. How old is your son? One thing that I've learned is that there's a distinct possibility that this was part of my daughter's learning disability however, I'm not saying that every child who experiences these has a learning disability.

It might be worth examining if things have changed in your child's life -- have you introduced new foods, new routines, new spaces, etc? My daughter experienced this as part of extreme separation anxiety (which is part of that learning disability) and it showed up when we moved her from the family bed to her very own first bed at about 3 1/2 or 4. It never (that I recall) happened when she was sharing the family bed -- so the process of her going into her own space at nighttime happened over a very long period of time.

She's healthy, thriving and about to receive her undergrad degree in a city far away so she's managed OK in the interim. I'm not sure if this is useful for you and, whatever happens, I hope this passes soon. All the best with addressing it.

pog, my kids (5 and 9) never had these so I don't have much to offer in terms of advice or comfort. My daughter (9) has the occasional bad dream, which I know is nothing like you describe. This must be terrible to experience for both of you, so my heart really goes out to you.

Dana.

I was just reading Barbara Colloroso's "Kids Are Worth It" and she briefly discusses night terrors. Here's what she says,

"Night terrors are a far cry (both literally and figuratively) from nightmares. Around the age of two, after an especially stressful or conflict-ridden day, your child may begin fitfully throwing himself from one side of the bed to the other, screaming uncontrollably, all the while remaining in a deep sleep. The scream is bound to bring you running into your child's bedroom. As you reach the bedroom door, take a deep breath and calm yourself down before going to the child. The last thing your child needs is to be woken up from a night terror only to see a terrorized parent standing by his bed. After you've collected yourself, calmly shake your child awake and assure him he's going to be all right and that you will be there with him until he falls asleep again. He'll probably not remember the incident, and you'll probably never forget it." (1994, p217-218)

I have not yet experienced these with my son, but this passage in the book really upset me. I don't know how I'd handle this, so my thoughts are with you!

Hi Pog,

Storm Ormistan's "The Power of the Praying Parent" offered a chapter on this called "Praying through the child's room". It's an interesting chapter. She suggests playing hymns in the child's room while the child is away, and to check to see if there's anything in there that may have some kind of 'evil' in it (our bad aura). She had an incident where her child's friend lent him a game or something and in the back of the book on the game was some kind of evil thing. I thought it was an ... er... interesting take on the subject and chuckled a bit over the method, but was willing to try this with my 7 yr old who is anxiety ridden. Adding some happier and soothing music at night has helped and I haven't had him waking up in the night for about a month now and will keep this method going while it's working :) Don't know if it will work for you, and if you'd like some others to pray for you and your child in resolving the night terrors, please don't hesitate to ask.

Jan

My toddler has had a few night terrors as well. He sits in his bed and screams and cries, much like you described. I hold, rock and sing to him. Often to make ourselves feel better, my husband and I will bring Kevin into our bed. Although I don't fall back asleep I feel comforted hearing his gentle snores.

pog

You might try some special object like an angel or a stuffed animal and tell him it will keep him safe from bad dreams; just the idea might help him or a dreamcatcher above his head ( Indian artifact like a net with feathers on it).You didn't tell us the age of your child. I have noticed that kids Disney movies are often full of scary monsters. I've seem mothers with 2 yr. olds at these movies. So, I'd suggest keep him away from scary movies and scary T.V. They can be very terrifying for young children who may think these monsters are in their rooms or in their clothes closets. Check the room for shadows from light that he may think is a monster. He must be seeing something or hearing something in daily life that is bothering him .

Good Luck and Prayers for Sweet Dreams for Your Child

My son is 8 years old.

The night terrors started when he was entering Grade 2 last year. They lasted about a month (several per week) and then when he settled into the routine they went away. This Fall, my father has been very ill and has been in the hospital for two months. My son is very close to his grandfather and it really upset him to see Dad that way. I was also quite upset much of the time and I'm ashamed to say, he saw me that way on a number of occasions ( makes me feel like a bad mother). The night terrors started again about 6 weeks ago. I think in his case they are stress related (or caused by being overtired or having had caffine - likely Halloween candy!)

Things have calmed down, My Dad is still recovering but has been discharged from hospital so that is all good. But the terrors continue.

I don't have children so I have never experienced this before but I just want to say that I think that it is okay for your child to see you upset over big things. I know that you have to be strong for them but I think just saying, "I love Grandpa so much that it just really hurts me to see him hurt/sick/upset/etc" I don't know if that is always good advice but I think that sometimes parents hide too much from their children and it is important for children to see a parent handle a whole range of emotions.

Goodluck with everything....the only other advice i could suggest is going to the doctor to rule out anything medical.

Hang in there =)

Hi, pog - is your son a particularly sensitive, imaginative sort of child? My daughter experienced the same things - every night at about the same time - although at a very young age. They occurred at a time when we were living at my mom's because of renovations, my husband has just changed jobs, and I was having to undergo a biopsy. I guess I'll never really know if her night terrors were just a developmental stage, or whether she indeed picked up on our stress.

She has grown into a very sensitive child with a vivid imagination, which is a great gift, but also has its challenges. I suspect maybe kids with this temperament may be more prone to these sorts of things. Does that sound similar to your son?

We found the only way to bring her out of the terrors was to wake her up completely, and then put her back to sleep. Eventually, they stopped, but we never really did figure them out. I sympathize with you; I know how distessing they are.

My almost-two year old has night terrors every single time he misses having an afternoon nap. Needless to say, I don't let him skip very many afternoon naps!

pog

I'm so happy your Dad is recovering. May God bless him and send His Angels to protect him and surround him with love.

Serious family illness is very hard for us adults to deal with. We are often 'at our wit's end' and rightly so. Our kids do pick up on our emotions : 'Somethings badly wrong with grandpa and Mommy's going crazy'. They have two issues and more to deal with.

I don't believe in shielding them from reality but perhaps they don't need to hear chronic details of the illness on an ongoing basis. We could try to be a bit more quiet and less ruffled in front of the kids. You are the child's example and strength. If you fall down the child falls down and sometimes whole members of the family fall as well if we should be talking about cancer. Its a killer and a destroyer leaving its mark on everyone involved.

I did have occasion to know an eight year old girl who was having general problems at home and at school. She had visits to a psychologist at one time. Her mother often kept her out of school and took her to visit her sister ( the child's aunt) dying of cancer in the hospital. The Mom was an emotional basket case telling everyone she met details of the suffering while the child was there listening. I didn't feel it was good for the child to be exposed to so much and no doubt trying to make sense out of what was happening. ( I don't mean to make light of anything)

I'm so glad you and your Dad have come through the worst of it. Hopefully you can once again enjoy some humour and good times with your son. He needs it.

Love, Light and Peace. God is with you down in the valley as well as high on the mountaintop.

Thanks everyone for all your comforting thoughts. Aurora - YES, my son is very intellingent, very sensitive and very imaginative. I think you're right - these kinds of children are more affected by things than others.

Will try to keep things calm and happy at home and try to stay in a routine during the holidays ( I find the routine thing is comforting to children).

what a lot of wonderful advice you have been given...

my son never had nightmares and seemed to sail through ... he is a "normal" adult now :)
my daughter continuously had nightmares but never even remembered them in the morning... she is now a happy "normal" stressed mother of 2...

i think all of us have been given ways to cope and these ways are different for each of us. all that a mother can do is love and comfort when loving is required and talk/communicate when the child (underlined) has something they want to talk about.

what scares me is the folk that jump right in - into the water that is over their heads and start analyzing and assigning reasons and blow stuff up so that the child all of a sudden begins to realize that something must be wrong with him/her. how dangerous is that... so stay calm and love lots :))

Will do Mamas. Thank You.

Hi Pog...

I still have the occasional night terror...and I'm 51 years old. In my case, I suddenly wake up in the night...party awake anyway...I can't breathe and I think I'm going to die. Suddenly, I'm able to sit bolt upright in bed, gasping for air. It scares my wife more than it scare me, actually. Medical causes were eventually rulled out. Reports of adults having this problem go back to the Middle Ages. I did some research and some experts speculate that the legends of the Incubus and Sucubus...demons that would sit on your chest and try to seduce you sexually ( I don't experience that part of it)....probably stem from people experiencing night terrors.

Hi Pog

My son experienced these when he was very young, and I found that holding him and hummy softly in his ear seemed to calm him down a little and shortened the terror.

I think, maybe, the sound of your voice lightly humming may get through whatever part of their psyche is being affected.

PaganMom

Night Terrors. My daughter had night terrors when she was 4. They happenned after we moved homes. I have to admit they were terrifying, frustrating and exhausting for me. I was always amazed that when my daugher awoke in the morning, she had no recollection of the events. When having a night terror, she used to call for her mommy (me) but wouldn't respond to me at all. I couldn't comfort her. I used to dread going to bed because I knew that about 11:00, she would begin. They would last from 10 to 45 minutes.

The good news. They stopped, just as quickly as they had begun and now she is a wonderful, well adjusted 11 year old.

Hang in there. This too shall pass.

Pog

a family friend's child suffered from night terrors, and eventually took him to a doctor because even though they didnt happen all the time, they weren't going away... he ended up going to a sleep clinic overnight so that they could study the situation, im not sure the outcome, but I do know that they were able to control the situation...

Every once in a while, HappyChild has a bout of night terrors... I've found that sitting on the edge of her bed and singing (crooning?) some of the quiet songs she loves helps her to calm down. When she's hit a relatively balanced space, she tends to wake up. We have a bit of a conversation, a hug, and she's on her way back to sleep.

*My* adrenilin levels are over the top, though. :S

That must really suck 4 all of you. maybe a psychiatrist or psychologist could help. That is what I would recommend.

someone may have said this already, but you should maybe mention it to your pediatrician next time. there can be medically significant reasons for night terrors. rarely of course, but if they reoccur or persist perhaps it is worth looking into.

Some people seem to be confusing night terrors with nightmares. They are very different. Night terrors occur in a state of non-rem sleep, similar to sleepwalking. 2% of children get them, and yes, episodes can be triggered by being overtired.

My daughter had them so I did a lot of research about it. This is a great website:
http://askdrsears.com/html/7/T071300.asp

I found this information there:
"Can night terrors be prevented?
The following exercise has been shown to stop night terrors in 90% of children. For several nights, keep track of the time between falling asleep and the onset of the night terror. Then, wake him up 15 minutes prior to the expected time of the episode, get him out of bed and fully awake for 5 minutes. Do this for seven consecutive nights. If the night terrors recur, repeat the seven nights of awakenings."

After doing this our daughter went from having night terrors on a regular basis to only getting them occasionally when overtired.

i_am - I have heard of this too. And last year I did try it once or twice. I think I'll got back to it regularly as you suggest.

And yes, you are absolutely right. Night terrors and very different from nightmares. I too, have read quite a lot about it. There is no question about it - these are textbook night terrors. Always at the same time, always within 1-2 hours of going to sleep, never more than one per night, differing intensities to be sure but very troubling every time.

Thanks for the suggestion. I'll start that tonight and let you know what happens.

Stay tuned....

whoa totally not necessary k_dog!!! go read the guidelines of conduct

I asked my daughter and she said:

"I did a lot of research on the net about it. One of the best sites is
askdrsears.com He is one of the Attachment Parenting gurus. His page about
night terrors is
http://askdrsears.com/html/7/T071300.asp

It describes the method of getting rid of them. When we tried what he described
Izzy went from having them on a regular basis to only getting them occasionally
when she was overtired.

I have also read that it is inherited and related to sleepwalking in that it
occurs in a similar state of non-rem sleep."

I hope this helps.

k_dog - I cannot believe you said that to me. I am going to report you to the site admin right away. That has no place on Wondercafe or any place where civilized people are present.

Do not speak to me again.

Hi pog

I experienced that as a kid also , very vivid demonic dreams occurring almost nightly , I would see things while awake, wake up shaking and vomiting , it took a toll when I was about 11, woke up from a horrible dream shaking and vomiting, I was sick a week after that, I was taken to see doctors but nothing helped, I was afraid to tell anyone cus they would call me a chicken shit but my brother and sister would not sleep in my room any longer cus they say I would talk to these things in my sleep, so one day I told my Grandfather everything , he was a very strong believer in Christ because of a supernatural experience he had when he was 19 in world war 1. What he told me would rid me of my dreams, he told me to have faith in Jesus Christ, and before bedtime say a prayer of protection and BELIEVE that you will be protected, Guess what the dreams slowed down to about once a month to almost nothing.

From what I know today as an adult, kids like your son are very spiritually sensitive to the spirit world , your son will grow up to have a very big heart (if you don't see it in him already) he will grow to be a spiritually humble heart full person . This is the reason for the attacks he has now, but your son will remember these dreams and use them to spiritually grow towards God.

Im gona say a prayer for him.

Thank you Blackbelt. You're right - he is very sensitive. I take comfort in your words. Thank you.

pog,

You seem to have received a lot of support, good information, and hopefully helpful advice. I don`t have much to add, except another voice to say that my 2.5 year old son also has had them, though never lasting more than a few days in a row. I do pretty much as ribott mentioned - stay close, keep him safe, and sing softly. My wife and I read, and it was our experience too, that waiting it out with him seemed to be less traumatizing for him than waking him up. After a while he calms down and then, despite having looked all along like he was awake, he actually wakes up a bit, notices me there, reaches out and gets cuddled back to sleep. He seems completely oblivious to the whole thing, which is exactly what I too have read and many folks have posted about. My son also is very sensative and has a very active, imaginative mind. I`ll keep your son in my prayers, though it`s you and your husband who are likely (if you`re like me) most traumatized by the events!

HI Lissimore - you're right. The good news is that he has little ( if any) recollection of these events the next day. It is so hard on the parents though. But, I must say, they are less frigtening to us now because we know what to expect. Still very disturbing though.

Dear Pog, I suffered from night terrors as a child. My brothers and sisters recall my night terrors quite vividly (since I apparently woke the whole house). But one thing of interest to point out, is that my mother says that my night terrors were cyclical in nature. Because she kept a diary every day of her life, she started to notice that my night terrors would occur mostly in the fall months. I would go almost a full year without one, and then boom! I don't know if this is true of all sufferers but just one that my Mom had noticed. I had my last night terror (in the fall) when I was 32. I actually telelphoned my mother in the middle of the night telling her there was a man hiding under the kitchen sink. My screaming immediately alerted her that I was again experiencing a night terror. She came over to my apartment and found me curled up in a corner and got me back into bed. I have absolutely NO memory of this or any other night terror I experienced. I will say a little prayer for your son and your family.

How dee doo Pog!

I used to have these as a kid as well. In fact, I was scared of the dark until I was about 14. I've read lots of oogalee googalee spiritual things about this, but was only satisfied with an answer when I went to see a Jungain-oriented psychologist. She had presented lots of good info regarding why this may have been the case (given my prior childhood story etc.). It's really good to get some advice online...in fact, the stuff I've read on here is mostly really good. But I would say that if these are chronic take your child to a child-psychologist. Furthermore, I'd recommend finding one that's into the Jungian thang because Carl Jung had a lot to say about dreams....and it may even open you up to the spirituality of your own psyche...only my experience...not for everyone ;-)

This may sounbd crazy but I suffered from this as did my father and waht he used to do was to run a hair dryer over my head and slowly I would calm down. I do not know if there is any medical basis for this but I used to be terrified and be awake and asleep at the same time seeing all kinds of horros and the overwheleming feeling was everything closing in, the hairdryer slowly calmed be down. Next time this happens try hugging your child and warpping yourselves both in a warm blanket and be sure the head is covered at the top to stay warm and if this seems to help try to hair drier.

It is rough to see them so terrified but be unable to help. As the previous posters mentioned --the child is not aware of the night terror as it occurs in deep sleep and they don't remeber them upon waking --it is scarier for us than for them. General advice is NOT to interrupt their sleep --but as others say, stay close by, hum, sing or keep a calm atmosphere. Picking them up can make it worse and lead to worse flaiing and screaming.
My daughter started having them at 10 months and still has them when we travel or she is overtired (as this is a major trigger).

L

Hi pog it can be very scary for children when they have these night terrors, I have a neice who is seven now , while she was five and six years old she had serious nightmares and her mom spent a lot of time trying to get her to bed at night, for she knew she would have nightmares and did not want to go to sleep, I spent personal time with her on the nights I was there and explained to her that she belong to God and if she spoke with God before she went to bed and ask Jesus to watch over her, that He surely would. She wanted to get saved when she was six and after asking a Pastors advice, I explained that when you give your heart to Jesus he would watch over her night and day( we know Jesus watches over all children but she needed reassurance), and that each night before she went to sleep, to pray to Jesus to keep away the nightmares and to ask God to replace them with wonderful things, (she loves butterflies) I taught her how to meditate on beautiful butterflies , to walk with them and play with them in her mind before she went to sleep, at first she didnt believe it would work, but we kept doing this and it was no longer than a month , the nighmares were gone. Maybe your son needs the security of salvation, and the reassurance that Jesus is with him whether he is asleep or awake, maybe some meditation on car races, or what ever it is he likes, and teach him to clear his mind and imagine great and wonderul things before he goes to sleep, it work for my niece, I also prayed for her and ask Jesus to take these nightmares away. Praise Jesus for His great security. In Jesus love bygraceiam.

Line all entrances to their room with salt to keep out demons. You never know what may be out there!

Hey Pog

Yep my middle one gets the night terrors. Shes the family artist and dreamer.... all imagination!! We have come to understand that this is something that happens in some personality types as our brains grow and react to various stimulae in our lives. Its certainly scarey but we also see it as a part of a healthy child with an absolutely incredibly creative mind,

What we HAVE found... routine helps, overtired doesnt. As I write this I am reminded that many adults get these (myself included) triggered by bad late night eating habits,uncomfotable sleep and stress. The difference is that we can connect them to our daily habits where as with children our minds are not there yet.

ON Another NOTE.... NIGHTMARES! We went through the nightmare stage with all of our kids and found this trick to really work. We put a little basket in their room each night, which we called the "dream basket" Its job was to collect bad dreams. Each night after they would go to sleep, I would sneek into their room and shake some salt into the basket. Each morning after the kids got up, they would empty the "bad dreams" out the back door. I know sounds silly... but it worked! Very quickly the dream basket helped to take the edge off of going to bed and concerns of nightmares.

wow! There sure is a lot of advice and support out there for you. It's nice to hear that there are other parents out there who have been through this. It does pass. I wanted to add that this is something that two of my children suffer from. All three of my kids are light sleepers and cry in their sleep. Sometimes for a few seconds, sometime for much longer.
My son started when he was 5 months old, textbook. The sreaming was horrific. I would desperately try to hold him and rock him, he would scream worse. I put him on the floor and he would roll around and arch his back. My Dr. refused to believe it, but after all of my research, I knew it wasn't nightmares, and I was worried it was due to pain. After months of getting a regular schedule in place we finally settled down and eventually he stopped having them. My son is almost 5 and he hasn't had one in a very long time. He is very sensitive and creative, and being overtired is hard on him (and us!).
My daughter may have had one or two as a baby, but hers started more recently when we started potty training. We 'think' that she was sort of awaken by the need to pee and just started screaming. She responds to no one and kicks and screams. When she finally would come out of it she would ask to go the potty, but she was already wet. She is almost 3 and she gets them when she skips naps, and believe me I am TRYING to make her take them, but she is going through the terrible threes.
My youngest cries in her sleep like the other two do and so I am looking forward to her continuing the trend. She wouldn't want to be left out! ;)
It does suck, but it does pass. Just keep up the regular schedule and hope for the best!