LBmuskoka's picture

LBmuskoka

image

Suspending Sensibility

This young man was suspended from an Ontario High School for writing and distributing this letter....

 

PAUL GOMILLE’S LETTER TO YOUNG WOMEN

According to the young author, the passages in boldface are those the school’s administrators took issue with.

Could I please have your attention for a few moments? I guarantee you won’t regret listening to what I have to say. You definitely won’t regret hearing this in your life time, especially from a man of dignity. It’s an idea that I have held close to my heart even before the kilt controversy arose in the media. This message is not meant to address the kilt controversy directly by any means, but rather, this message is a general and all-encompassing statement. It is a message about the qualities that really matter in a woman, and what really makes a woman attractive. Although this speech has some relevance to the way women dress and present themselves nowadays, the message in this speech goes far beyond one’s preferences, or feelings of pressure, as it relates to the way they dress, and it goes far beyond any concept of modernity. It strikes at the very core of humanity itself, in an attempt to make a revelation of truth apparent to all of you, with awe inspiring certainty. If you read this, and receive anything less than a feeling of absolution from it, then I have committed a grave sin, a sin against myself and a sin against all of you.

The people this message concerns are the young women of this school, and of the world. In particular, it concerns the silent ones, the intelligent ones, the ones that don’t talk about people behind their backs, the ones that guys don’t flock to in droves, the ones that don’t dress in revealing clothing, the ones who would love to be in love, and the ones that are continually disappointed in their appearance because the only thing they have to compare themselves to are the women that have been put on pedestals by our society. This message also concerns those of you who may consider yourselves the so called “opposite” to the demographic I just described. The ones who do dress in revealing clothing, and the ones who try to fit in with the crowd.

You don’t need to dress or act a certain way to fit in, to feel attractive, or to BE attractive. You’re all far more attractive than you realize. All of you. But that’s not to say that you should all dress in revealing clothing. No, not at all. Sure, a girl who dresses that way might turn a few heads, and get some compliments. But real attractiveness doesn’t come from wearing the latest fashion, and it doesn’t come from being scantily clad in public, or putting on make-up, or having a pretty face, or a nice body. No. Real attractiveness comes from having a certain dignity. It comes from having class. It comes from being true to yourself, being yourself, and being comfortable in your own skin. This message is for all young women within the sound of my voice and beyond. You’re all beautiful. You all have inner beauty AND outer beauty.

 

Click below for Toronto Star article

Student fights suspension over letter praising women’s ‘inner beauty’

Share this

Comments

LBmuskoka's picture

LBmuskoka

image

"Opposition to Authority"?

 

The young man deserves applause not suspension and any Authority that believes otherwise should not be in authority.

 

 

The authority of those who teach is often an obstacle to those who want to learn.
     Marcus Tullius Cicero (106 BC-43 BC)

gecko46's picture

gecko46

image

A young man writes with maturity and shows sensitivity towards women/girls and gets suspended....something very wrong with this picture.  An authoritarian principal who is out of touch with reality.

 

Praise for this young man...he is a gem.

Tyson's picture

Tyson

image

That is a fantastic and deeply profound letter. What a vulgar display of power this principal has shown. She should be drawn and quartered for suspending this student. She should also feel the deepest shame. That letter should be plastered in every school in the country.

MistsOfSpring's picture

MistsOfSpring

image

According to the article, the student was suspended for distributing the letter as it was written instead of making a few changes that the principal had wanted him to make.  That was the opposition to authority.  The principal felt that a few of the phrases sounded a bit judgemental.

 

I think the letter is excellent exactly the way it is.  I wouldn't have required any changes in order to allow the student to distribute it.  The student did defy authority by distributing it widely throughout the school after being told he had to make changes to it first, though.  Should that be suspendable???  I'm not sure, to be honest. 

 

According to the article, the principal "suggested some revisions to the address, in particular sentences where Gomille is “judgmental” and describes his audience as “the ones that don’t talk about people behind their backs, the ones that guys don’t flock to in droves, the ones that don’t dress in revealing clothing.”

 

Could he have toned down or changed the wording here to appease the principal and not lost the meaning or impact of the overall letter?  I think he could have.  He chose, instead, to copy and share the letter without making any changes.  Whether or not the changes were truly necessary is irrelevant to the suspension. 

 

The question here is whether or not students have the right to publish materials and distribute them to their classmates inside a school without permission from the principal.  More specifically in this case, do the students have the right to distribute materials that the principal has already refused?  Would it make a difference if the student had written "to the ones who don't f*ck any guy who looks at them"?  I'm guessing that for most people that would cross the line; the principal's line was at a different place, and it's the principal's school.  The principal had every right to suspend him.

 

Don't get me wrong...I'm glad he didn't change his wording.  I'm glad he kept his integrity as a writer.  I'm even glad that he distributed the letter as it is.  I think it takes a lot of character and strength to go against the principal on this issue, and I think he's a wise and intelligent young man.  None of that is negated by the suspension.  Rather than trying to get the suspension off his record, I think he should think of it as a badge of honour.  It's a record of a time that he stood up for something he believed in, even though there were consequences for doing it.  It has also been a vehicle for spreading his message much farther than the walls of his school.

ninjafaery's picture

ninjafaery

image

Sounds like it was more about the principal "saving face" before the young man. Couldn''t let a thing like that passs without punishment. (heaven forbid). 

It's terribly sad that his depth and maturity were not valued.  The letter should have stood the way it was -- no editing needed. The words as written are very poignant and healing.

I hope this letter gets wide distribution. It reminds me of my own experience as a girl in highschool. I would have been so grateful to have such affirmation from a guy. He's probabably changed the course of many lives. Really.

kaythecurler's picture

kaythecurler

image

Authority really messes with some people's thinking power.

 

Had the person in authority just ignored the distribution of a letter it would have stayed in the school instead of going viral.

 

Personally I can't find a way to fault the young man's words nor can I understand why he was told to change them.

chemgal's picture

chemgal

image

I don't agree with the suspension.  He wanted to give a speech, was told to change things if he were to do so.  Instead of making the changes, he distributed the message as letters on his own time.  Unless there is some rule about distributing notes outside of classes within the school I don't understand why he was suspended. He didn't do anything directly to oppose authority.

 

A speech would imply some approval from the school, so would putting up posters on school grounds, or if there was some 'help' with delivering the letters if they were handed out to every class or something of that sort.  If he just handed out the letters himself (or even with friends) that would imply a personal message, not one approved by the school.

graeme's picture

graeme

image

He should thank the principal. It sounds like a school worth missing.

musicsooths's picture

musicsooths

image

I think the letter was provound the way it was written and I admire the writers gutts in defying authority to get it out there. Sometimes you have to spend some time in "Prison" to get your message accross, look at Paul and the number of times he was in the same position as this young man.

InannaWhimsey's picture

InannaWhimsey

image

what a soulful, life-affirming, cynicism-destroying letter

 

 

LBmuskoka's picture

LBmuskoka

image

chemgal wrote:

I don't agree with the suspension.  He wanted to give a speech, was told to change things if he were to do so.  Instead of making the changes, he distributed the message as letters on his own time.  Unless there is some rule about distributing notes outside of classes within the school I don't understand why he was suspended. He didn't do anything directly to oppose authority.

 

A speech would imply some approval from the school, so would putting up posters on school grounds, or if there was some 'help' with delivering the letters if they were handed out to every class or something of that sort.  If he just handed out the letters himself (or even with friends) that would imply a personal message, not one approved by the school.

 

That is the crux of the matter, chemgal.

 

The principal refused to allow him to speak to the student body unless the changes were made.  He chose not to compromise his opinion and distributed the letter.

 

The lesson being taught here is one of censorship.

 

The school authorities had the right to deny the speech being made in their auditorium.  The authorities should not have the right to deny a written communication to be distributed personally.

 

 

And where once you had the freedom to object, to think and speak as you saw fit, you now have censors and systems of surveillance coercing your conformity and soliciting your submission. How did this happen? Who's to blame? Well certainly there are those more responsible than others, and they will be held accountable, but again truth be told, if you're looking for the guilty, you need only look into a mirror. I know why you did it.

I know you were afraid. Who wouldn't be? War, terror, disease. There were a myriad of problems which conspired to corrupt your reason and rob you of your common sense.
       Alan Moore, V for Vendetta

revjohn's picture

revjohn

image

Hi LBmuskoka,

 

LBmuskoka wrote:

The young man deserves applause not suspension and any Authority that believes otherwise should not be in authority.

 

Amen.

 

Grace and peace to you.

John

Back to Politics topics