i don't want you to feel like a martyr, Naman, so I will post to your thread.

Actually, Crazyheart, I think that I feel more like a scapegoat. Where is Casey Jones the brave engineer?

Hi naman,

Wannabees maybe.  None actually.

The reason for the distinction is simple, participation here is voluntary.

It may be true that some do not like the box that they are being pushed into.  It seems very obvious that nobody sits down and considers why they are being pushed into said boxes, most appear more than happy to play the role even though they complain about being placed in that role.

I suspect most of it is communication problems.  Some here still have a difficult time conveying their message in a print based medium and still others infer tone and accuse others of saying what was never said or even meant.

Reaction appears to be favoured over reflection by some.

After communication comes optics, how things appear.  If conflict between members was relegated to singular threads then it would be barely noticeable.  Some appear to need more attention than singular threads and make sure to drag ill will from one thread into other threads.  Again, check the dance cards and see if it isn't just a few who appear to enjoy crowding the dance floor.

One observation I made a number of years ago, that others here have also mentioned recently is that with few exceptions the longer a thread gets the more heated it becomes.  Some threads are car wrecks from the initial post and the more voices that pile on the worse the wreck becomes.

 I regret when a thread I have been enjoying becomes a brawl.  I don't own threads and I don't control my fellow posters so if I'm no longer enjoying the thread I move on to something else.

Grace and peace to you.

John

Thanks Revjohn, enough said to make my day a happy one. Will someone conclude this thread by posting a link to the Ballad of Casey Jones?

For Naman:

I plead guilty, but I humbly repent and am working on communicating without causing offense.  Forgive me.

You can disagree on-line without yelling at another person (what a concept!)  

Revjohn is right, people says things on line they would never say to a person they were talking to.   We are probably conditioned by evolution to have some basic skills at diplomacy at a spoken level (although some people even lose it there), but the new medium of on-line posting short-circuits that.   We did not evolve to discuss things on-line!

Actually, EasternOrthodox, I think that we evolved pretty much according to the Law of the Jungle.

Naman:

We did, but we are also a social animal (like a number of other species) and they also evolve ways of getting along (at least with members of their own troops or packs or whatever they may be called.

I have just gone to Google, wondering whether the internet offers some sort of Facebook survival guide.

I came up with.....    www.angriesout.com/grown20.htm

It describes The Drama Triangle.

I am not good at embedding links and the above link does not work.

Google-   The Drama Triangle The Three Roles of Victimhood

Instructions on posting links--go to this thread and scroll down to a post by me on Sep 26, 2011.  

(I spent a lot of time on that post ! )

http://www.wondercafe.ca/discussion/politics/us-withholding-promise-aid-...