It would be outrageous for anyone to expect you to lock your pets up just so they can bring theirs.  If the pets can't get along, then her dog should be the one to stay home.

For most of my life I have had either a dog or a cat or both.  I don't believe I ever took them anywhere they were not welcome.  Sometimes for a short visit (1/2 hour or so) I would tell my lab to wait for me by the car, in the shade of a tree or hedge.  Sometimes when the host(ess) found out, he would tell me to bring my dog in.  In that case Pepper would sit at my feet, or on the mat by the door.

Once circumstances required that I take her with me for a two day visit to a cottage.  They had a dog.  Being a lab, Pepper was happy staying outside on the varanda or in the yard most of the time.  I planned to let her sleep in my car.  However after the few hours, their Shelty decided that Pepper posed no threat and let her come in the house.  She slept beside my bed.

If the Shelty had had any problems with Pepper being there, I would have left early rather than upset their household.  The home dog (or cat) has rights that should be respected.

I agree with seeler. Pets are not welcome if you have pets of your own and if there will be a disruption. My friend has two big cats and her brother and family came with 3 dogs, What a disaster. They were asked not to bring them again and they were miffed. What's that all about?

I'm shocked that they would bring them without asking if it was okay first.  Has no one heard of common courtisy?(spelling?)  If it's your house you have the right to say if you don't want them to bring their pets.

I agree with everyone else. We've taken our dog places but only after asking if she would be welcome and only if we know that she gets along with any pets they have. If she's not welcome or they don't get along, she doesn't go.

I think it's terrible manners to take your pet to another person's home without the pros and cons thoroughly discussed with the friend/relative.  Bad mojo for the dog

So not cool.

 Our family is like a 3 ring circus.

Dogs:  we have 2, my aunt has 2, my sister had 2 but now just 1, my parents have 1, my brother has 3, my inlaws have 1.  My brother generally leaves his home, but the rest of us just pile them into the house.  One cottage trip had 6 dogs for 4 days, plus a bunch of people.We wouldn't expect other people to put up with us.  

We've found after the initial buzz of arriving, everyone settles down and the dogs are as happy together as any group of kids, and easier to manage.  Even the big ones squish down on the floor to play happily with the big ones.  You'd never know there was a breed difference.  

I've got  a great pic of 4 dogs all squeezing their heads under the fence to bark at us.  Very funny.

Ok ok- ettiquette - we don't take our dogs elsewhere, we warn invited visitors about our dogs (so they know the dogs won't be locked out of their own house), we clean up after our own when rarely needed.  We welcome other dogs here if they appear, though most people don't bring them (outside family) and then insist on good dog behaviour.  I guess we're pretty easy going.

I would always expect that someone let us know they would like to bring a dog, and discuss first.  Our dogs are generally pretty good around other dogs, and so, they are welcome, but, we do manage the introductions and keep an eye.  In addition, we have expectations of  reasonably behaved dogs. 

My husband cannot abide dogs that mooch at the table...so, if a guest dog does, we put them downstairs in the recroom when we have dinner, if they are moochers.  Some people do not appreciate that and have since not brought their dogs over... We also do not allow dogs we do not know to come into a room where little ones are in, especially if those dogs do not appear to be well trained.  Again, this has caused a bit of heartburn with family members who felt their pets were being excluded, but I would rather have a dog excluded than risk a toddler being knocked over..or worse, bit.

I do get fed up with mature dogs that are not properly house trained, and leave presents around my house...but I will put up with it.

I guess, some people have very different expectations of pets.  To me, a dog is not a a human. They are dogs.  They are to be trained so that even if a little one did something foolish and hit them, they know to not counter. They are not fed human food...and so, are less likely to try to steal of mooch it.  They need time outside, and so, should get it...and time to be played with as well.

While I have no problem with somebody bringing their dog to my house (or trailer), I would be loath to bring my 110 lb German Shepherd to another's - especially anyone who practises the rudiments of cleanliness (I don't). Kaspar Milquetoast is a good natured, poorly trained canine oaf.

The basics of pet etiquette is 1) Don't take your pet anywhere unless you are sure it is welcome. 2) Don't go anywhere that you feel uncomfortable with their pet.

There's lots of neutral ground in this world.

I would guess that perhpas the issue is if you can bring your dog rather than put them in a kennel.

My brother sometimes brings his dog to our house and they keep in him line.  We do the same when we visit there.  We can't leave our dog alone for a day and don't want to put her in a kennel for a day either as she is elderly.

but just like i expect kids to have manners i expect dogs to have manners too

A visiting dog should be the one to get along.  If not , they are the ones that require housing in the bedroom or whereever so they don't offend the "owner" dog

We have two cats who have only had experiences with two big dogs and a basset hound.  The big dogs have scared them as they have walked past our open door so that the cats won't go out into the condo hallway -- which is a Good Thing..  

The basset hound was brought by a friend who visited for a couple of hours while on the way back from taking his dog to the vet.  He was going to leave the dog in the car, but we put the cat food up in the cat tree and had him bring the dog in.  The dog is used to visiting another house that has a number of cats, and he just ignores the cats while the cats ignore him.  

The dog walked around the condo sniffing everything while our cats climbed onto high perches and watched the dog intently.  Our older cat finally jumped down and got onto my partner's lap; the dog came over and started sniffing the cat.  The cat got tense and started sniffing the dog back.  After several seconds the dog realized that the cat is just furniture and walked away to do more sniffing.  The cat took a while to relax a bit while he kept his eye on the dog.

That basset hound is welcome to visit again.  I wouldn't want somebody to bring a dog over for an overnight stay unless we know that the dog and the cats will get along.

I agree with everyone's comments.  You should ask first.  I have a cat, who I would never take to someone's house without asking.  Why do people assume that they can bring their dog to my house without asking?  No matter how sweet the dog, it traumatizes my cat.  She's so scared of them.

Also, I warn potential visitors that I have a cat, in case anyone has allergies.  Shouldn't dog owners do the same?

BTW - This is my first post.  Glad to join you in the 'cafe!

welcome, golfergurl, and glad you joined in.